Is it just me, or do all 'Easter Bunnies' look mildly demented?
Monday, April 27, 2009
Easter/Trip to Denver
We had a great time visiting my sister Anna and her family over the Easter weekend. Not having any of my immediate family close, it was a rejuvenating thing to spend time with my sister. It was nice just chilling and spending time chatting with Anna and Paul and their 4 awesome kiddos. Oh, and, yes we also played Rock Band for the first time. Kenny and I are both pretty opposed to video games, but it was fun. Kenny rocked it, I was pathetic at best. I like to get my groove on and can follow most any beat, but there is something trippy about the structured mechanics of trying to watch a tv screen and follow the lights to keep up with a rythym. When I just relaxed and actually listened to the song was the only time I actually made it through a whole song and didn't fail out completely.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
One Word Tag
1. Your cell phone is: bondage
2. Your significant other is: love
3. Your hair: changing
4. Your mother: worrier
5. Your father: giant
6. Your favorite thing: family
7. Your dream last night: paranoid
8. Your dream goal: northwest
9. Favorite room: bedroom
10. Your hobby: nature
11. Your fear: loss
12. Where you want to be in six years: northwest
13. Where you were last night: enrichment
14. What you're not: dramatic
15. One of your wish list items: green home
16. Where you grew up: Snohomish
17. The last thing you ate: green curry (homemade, thank you very much)
18. What you are wearing: jeans
19. Your TV: progressively more scratched
20. Your pet: future wish
21. Your computer: warranty lapsed, dang
22. Your mood: hopeful
23. Missing someone: Sage, Dad
24. Your car: funky (for a new car at least)
25. Something you're not wearing: makeup
26. Your favorite store: REI
27. Your summer: too hot in Utah
28. Love someone: Always
29. Your favorite color: Green
30. Last time you laughed: yesterday
31. Last time you cried: 2 nights ago
Tagged: anyone who reads this!! Come on, it's fun!
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Happy Birthday Dad!!!
Today would be my Papa's 60th birthday... I miss him so much. No one can ever take the place of your Dad. He was the biggest, strongest, wisest person in my life... the one I went to for all of the gospel questions, the car questions, the fix-it questions. It is hard not having him to turn to when those 'Dad questions' arise.
But... I know he is happy and is doing important work that was reserved just for him to do. I am glad that he is not 60 years old on this earth doing the physical labor he did all his life, he has been released. I know that he is holding my little Sage's hand, and that is one of the most comforting images in the world to me.
Love you Dad... forever!!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
My how you can grow!!
Here is a picture of Finn at 1 day old and another of him at 6 weeks old. Our little Buddha babe.
The blessed arrival of Finnias Sky (a little late!)
So, it is a long time coming... but our beautiful baby Finn finally arrived on December 29th, 2008 (one week past his due date). He came big... weighing in at 9lbs 8oz and 21 inches long. After over a month of pre-term labor, our midwife Holly agreed to come and break my water, which was the final kicker after trying just about everything to get him here (except being medically induced). He was born just 2 hours and 15 minutes after my water broke. It was a very intense and fast labor (although it felt quite long!!). Holly says that when people ask me how long the birthing lasted, we can either say 1 month or 2 hours!
We feel so happy and blessed to have been able to have the home birth that we so desired (for a while towards the end we thought we may have to be transferred to the hospital because he just wasn't wanting to come on his own). The birth was as peaceful and beautiful as we had hoped it would be. Finn was born in a blow-up tub in the exact place where his bed now sits. We think it is pretty cool that he now sleeps in the same place where he made his entrance into this world.
We are thankful to our wonderful and wise midwife Holly who worked expertly to guide Finn's very large shoulders out of me body. That was fun... not!!! Holly is a very chill lady who knows exactly when to whip into action when the situation calls for it! Our kind of midwife!
Finn is such an incredible little spirit. We call him our 'zen baby'. He was born happy just like his big brother, River. I swear that he has been smiling since the day he was born... gas, shmass. As for the little River, he is a wonderful big brother... so loving and kind with Finn. Finn is his "nice brother baby".
We are just so thankful to have Finn here, live and healthy. Two healthy, sweet, loving, cuddly boys... life couldn't be more blessed!!!
Friday, September 19, 2008
Sheep and the Belly
Okay, this is good. 3 Posts in one day instead of one every 3 months. Here are some pics of the beautiful long horned sheep we ran into on the way to the Flaming Gorge last weekend. There was a huge wild herd of them and I had never seen such an animal. They look like deer with the face of a muscular lamb. This was a female herd, I am told that the males have enormous horns. Very cool. We also ran into huge herds of cows on the way just wandering in the road... I think it was open range land. I love cows, I think they are so cool. I miss seeing them every day (in Washington), I think there is something very beautiful about a black and white cow in a sparkling green dew covered field early in the morning. Fields in western WA can be almost flourescent green and in contrast to the black and white of the cows, it is very pretty I think. Cows are just so mellow, I want to be chill like that... just enjoying the peace of a pretty field of long grass.
Okay, enought about cows.
Unfortunately, we were too preoccupied to get any pics of our actually fishing trip down the Green River. It is a beautiful place, world renowned for fly fishing. It was my first time fly fishing, lets just say I want to go fishing by myself for a bit before I go with my husband and father in-law again. Having two (fly-fishing enthusiast) guys in your ear telling you what to do every second is not fun or relaxing, you can only be instructed so much before you just need to go do it. I ended up just putting down the fishing rod and trying to enjoy a ride down the river.
River went down with us the first day and stayed with Grandma the second. He did amazingly well on a drift boat with Mama clinging on to him every second for nearly 6 hours. We were impressed. After 6 hours on the river the first day and about 9 the second day, Ms. Prego was officially wasted. I have been spending the better part of the week recuperating.
The next pic is of my belly taken just yesterday. I am about 6 1/2 months preggers with Finn. He is due at Christmas... Christmas never seemed so far away! Most people think I am small (which tends to tick me off, haha), but I am actually quite a bit bigger than I was at this point with either River or Sage.
Preschool Time
So, I am just trying to catch up on the latest River news. River started preschool a couple of weeks ago. It was surprising the big emotions of such simple event. He is not a baby anymore, even though he will forever be my baby. In fact, only Mama is allowed to call him 'my baby' still, not even Papa can get away with calling him such a thing... he is Papa's big boy. Here are some pics of his first day of preschool as well as some of his first art projects he came home with.
River, the next Bono?
So. We want River to pursue anything his little heart desires, but to speak honestly... we would be thrilled if he developed a love for art or music as far as talents/passions go. Well, so far he mostly just digs on trucks, tractors, heavy machinery. He wants to be a "worker" more than anything. It is all good. He really has no interest in art yet and perhaps never will, and that is okay. But we are thrilled that he does seem love music. In fact, I think he might become something of an August Rush... or at least Bono. He can hum the melody of any song after hearing it only once and he loves to watch concerts on t.v.. There is a song by the Gorillas that is called Demon Days (River calls it "to the sun") that he will watch as many times as we will let him. Featured in the song is a really groovy gospel choir with a really cool guy directing it. River likes to think he is the director. He always gets all his instruments out and will copy everything he sees. He directs Kenny and I when to come in with the backround vocals, violin, drums, ect. and is very vocal about correcting us if we play any instrument at the wrong time. He also loves to watch U2 concert videos ("Papa's favorite music") and will watch a whole concert through, mimiking everything Bono does. He even runs to find sunglasses to wear as soon as the show starts. Here are some pics of River being Bono.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Missing Sage
It feels like just yesterday Sage was moving wildly inside me (as always), itching to come out. It feels like just yesterday I was washing and folding Sage's little girl clothes, lining up her her tiny diapers on the changing table, being miserably pregnant and ready for our little girl to be here already... dreaming every night of holding her, and watching her grow with her big brother River. It seems like just yesterday Kenny was talking to her in my belly, telling her we couldn't wait for her to come. It doesn't seem like a whole year has passed since the tragic day she stopped moving inside me, the day she did come... September 7th, 2007.
It has been a surreal week. The anticipation of the one year anniversary has been overwhelming. I have been feeling suprisingly numb a lot of the time, Kenny has been struggling a lot more intensly. Dealing with the still shocking reality that Sage is not here for us to hold, and we wont be able to hold her for the rest of our earthly lives. We have survived for a year without her, but we have so many more years of living without her to endure.
Kenny and I went away for most of the weekend, to try to escape our emotions and the ever-present flashbacks of what we were doing a year ago. We tried to plan some fun things to do, to try and find some peace and quiet in the mountains. It didn't work too well, especially without River. When we picked River up Sunday afternoon I felt like I could breathe again, and didn't want to let go of him. It created a lot of anxiety in me to be so fiercly missing our child we lost and to be away from our living child as well.
As we drove through the mountains Sunday, we picked some wild flowers for Sage along the way. Sage's grave marker was installed just on Friday (after a nightmare of a week of unreal problems getting it here, I won't go into that story). We are thankful that the marker is finally here, in the right place, and feel that it perfectly reflects our tender thoughts of our sweet baby Sage. It is a horrible thing to have to bury your child and so surreal to have to choose a grave marker for your child. But at the end of that process, it is a sweet thing to have a place dedicated to the memory of your baby girl.
A little photo album of Sage: the first from an ultrasound when she was about 32 weeks, next a picture of River and I with Sage in the belly about 4 days before Sage was delivered, a picture of Sage about an hour after delivery, a pic of Sage's grave marker, and lastly... her grave decorated 1 year after her stillbirth.
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